Obliviation!
by LBlack08
Summary: Ah, the possibilities. Just one little flick of the wand and a short incantation, and it is as if nothing ever happened. Hermione finds the joy in Obliviation. Rated T for language. Complete!
1. Learning a New Spell

Disclaimer: Well, I wrote Rowling a letter asking for the rights of Harry Potter, but she wouldn't budge. Yep, no Harry Potter characters for me.

**Obliviate!**

"And then you just finish with a flourish and say _Obliviate!_" Remus spoke the incantation clearly and forcefully.

"Wow, thanks Remus. This should come in handy once I move to muggle London. I don't want them to see me performing any magic…. or even hear me just saying random words in Latin." Hermione laughed. "Anyways, I'll see you later!"

Hermione left Remus' flat in a hurry, so she could meet up with Ginny at the Leaky Cauldron. She was already late, but the fact that she was a witch meant she could be there in a split second- traffic or no.

The Leaky Cauldron was bustling with activity when Hermione appeared, but she saw Ginny patiently waiting in a booth. They both hurried to the brick wall and into Diagon Alley to get away from the overwhelming smell of smoke, ale, and the day's special: pasta with newt eyes.

"So what's up with you and Harry?" Hermione questioned slyly."Do you have anything planned for your one-year anniversary?"

"Oh nothing special." Ginny replied tiredly, "Probably just dinner and some time alone."

"Nothing, nothing exciting at all? He hasn't said anything about Paris? I thought he told me that the both of you would be spending the week there, since you rarely get time off from Healer training, and he wanted to see you-"

"PARIS? Oh my gosh oh my gosh oh my gosh. PARIS!" Ginny yelled for all the alley to hear.

"Um. I guess I was not suppposed to say anything, but Harry didn't tell me not to tell you. Look, you have to act surpri-" Hermione stuttered before cut off again by the hysterical Ginny.

"PARIS?"

"Ginny, listen to me! Gin! (PARIS?) That's it. _Obliviate!_" Hermione said the spell and looked expectantly at her friend.

"What was that? I'm so sorry, my mind wandered off there. What were you saying Hermione?" Ginny asked with a glazed look in her eyes.

_Nifty! _"Oh, we need to purchase some new robes. Mine are getting a bit worn, don't you think?" Hermione replied innocently.

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The chair definitely looked better in the corner. With the way the sun hit it, it should be a nice spot to read. Hermione finished unpacking at her new flat when a knock came from the door.

"Coming! (_Alohomora!) _Hello, Ron. Thanks for stopping by."

"Nice place you got here, Mione. Not too shabby- not at all." Ron said while he looked around the spacious 2 bedroom flat.

"No, _Ronald_, it's a nice place _we_ have here." Hermionecorrected. "You are still moving in after Quidditch season, right?"

"Of course, Mione. You couldn't pay me to stay away from you. I love you, remember?" Ron gave her a face.

"Yes."

"And we are getting married in less than a year, remember?"

"Yes."

"So why would you think that I _wouldn't_ be moving in with you the second I am able?"

"Oh,it's nothing. Just Laven-" Hermione began.

"Not this again! I told you I don't have feelings for Lavender! I am marrying you, aren't I?" Ronald exclaimed.

"I know, but since she is a chaser on the team, she gets to see you more than I do! Then there is whatever it was that you felt for her, and she might try something with you, and-"

"Mione! I told you I don't like her. I have told you again and again. Why can't you trust me? I don't like it that you don't trust me, and I don't like it that we are constantly arguing." Ron said, frustrated. "Life should be happy. Voldemort is gone, I'm keeper for the Cannons, I'm marrying you; everything is going right, except this. I just- I need to go think."

"No, Ron, wait. I love you, but I miss you, and I get stressed out, and my mind goes over the possibilities, and I…" A single tear began to make its way down her face.

"I forgive you, Mione. I just have to go take a walk. I'll check back in later, okay?" Ron wiped the tear away with his finger and began to walk to the door.

"Ron, don't leave like this. Oh! Oh! _Obliviate!_…That's better. Cup of tea, Ronald?" Hermione asked with cheerfulness.

"That would be brilliant. It's a bit chilly out there, did you know? No snow yet, though." Ron shook his head disappointedly.

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"It's so good to see you, Harry. How is auror training going?" Hermione fiddled with her coffee cup.

"Oh, well, it's hard, but not too bad. All those years beating off Voldemort was good training. I am learning many new spells, and more than just a few of them would have been fun to use on the Dursleys." Harry laughed softly as he said the last bit.

"Oh, Harry, don't joke about that, or you could find yourself hearing from the Misuse of Magic Office sooner than you would like." Hermione warned with her best McGonagall face.

"Oh never, Mione, never again."Harry swore with false seriousness."Mafalda owes me a few favors, I think, from saving her boyfriend from those Death Eaters."

"Harry, you defeated one of the greatest dark wizards ever. I am sure everyone owes you a few favors, but enough about that. I wanted to ask you about Kreacher. I know you bound him to live forever in misery in Grimmauld Place, but I was wondering if I could have him at my flat. I know that I am against the imprisonment of house elves, but I hope that I might help him. I think he may be a bit mad, but if I could just use some muggle psychology techniques, then he could sort of rejoin reality. I am sure he is not _really _all that evil. He just- Harry?"

"Not _REALLY _all that evil, Hermione. We are talking about the creature that attributed in a large part to my godfather's death! He is the bloody epitome of evil. Seriously, Hermione! I abandoned Grimmauld Place to Kreacher just hoping he could live out his days in misery, _alone._ Psychology! I can't believe what I am hearing? How could you-"

"Oh bother. _Obliviate!_… I am really off today. What is _wrong _with me?" Hermione said to herself.

"Is _that_ what you called me here to answer, Mione?" Harry chuckled. " I'm sure it was all that time in the library. Not enough sunlight in there."

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"Severus. There you are. Here are the potion ingredients that you ordered. Quite the opposite of 2nd year, right?" Hermione said when Severuslifted the heavy boxes from her arms.

"I'm sure I have no idea what you are alluding to."

"Oh, you know," Hermione said absently while she checked the inventory,"that time that I had to go through your personal stores to find the last ingredient for the polyjuice potion and-"

"You WHAT! And what potion did you make? 2nd year!" Snape seethed.

"Ack! Why are you yelling at me? Potion? 2nd year? Bloody Hell! Did I just say that? Why doesn't this surprise me? _Obliviate!…_Anyway, all of the ingredients for next year should be there, so-" Hermione turned around so Snape could not see the smile on her face.

"That will be all. You may go, Miss Granger- or should I say Mrs. Weasley?" Snape sneered before shutting the door in Hermione's face.

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_How many people lost a bit of their memory because of me today? **I** lost count after the incident in Dumbledore's office. I couldn't very well charm Fawkes though. Was I dreaming or did that phoenix wink at me?_

_Now I know what Lockhart felt like. Just a simple Obliviate! does the trick. And **now** I know why not everybody knows the obliviation charm. I should be a responsible person, but here I am, obliviating every person I meet. Imagine if **Ron**_ _knew how to do it. He would do it wrong, and I would be sitting in the permanent ward in St. Mungo's right now- not a care in the world. That's it. No more obliaviation for me…today. I might need it later for something really important. _


	2. Meetings and Interior Decorating

Disclaimer: That's it. I can keep this secret no longer. It's tearing me up inside. I, Luthien Black, do not own Harry Potter. You may now give the credit to a woman named J.K.Rowling. I am sorry I lied to you all for so long. sniffle

Author's Note: Obviously this story is AU because Dumbledore is too awesome a character to abandon, and I am not ready for Snape and Draco to be irrevocably evil- not that they are now in the books. We just have to wait for book seven. Isn't it a happy thought that even when the series ends, the fanfiction doesn't have to?

**Chapter 2**

**Meetings and Interior Decorating**

Hermione scrubbed the kitchen table hard, trying to coax off a ring left from her glass of orange juice, but it was proving to be very stubborn. She would need to stop by Flourish and Blotts later on to see if they had a book on house-cleaning charms. She scrubbed for one minute more, until the ring was only visible if you happened to know its exact location.

_Yes, that will do. _She told herself. _I can always find a spell later on to get the rest of it. Now, where did I set my wand. No, not there. Not there either. Where **is** it? Oh, right, in my wand holster. Okay, everything seems to be in order. Eek! I better get to the staff meeting ASAP!_

Once Hermione had graduated as valedictiorian from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, Headmaster Dumbledore had requested that she fill the position of proffessor of Charms, and she readily agreed. (Flitwick had chosen to retire since the war was over.) She had recently completed her second year of teaching, yet everyday was still as exciting as the last. Dumbledore had even made her head of Ravenclaw house, and she enjoyed watching all of its prodigies grow up before her eyes.

Now, however, she was late to a staff meeting Headmaster Dumbledore had suddenly called, and she had yet to find the reason for it. There was no time left to wonder, though, when she arrived at the statue before his office. She told it the password (Skittles!) and rode up the stairs.

"Enter." Dumbledore commanded.

Hermione strode into the unusually decorated office and looked around at all the familiar paintings and gadgets. It was all the same, all unchanged by the war. It even smelled the same. This time, however, she was not offered a lemon drop by the old man who always had a twinkle in his eye. She turned her observant gaze upon the other proffesors that filled the room and found them staring at her aggravatedly.

Snape turned to face the headmaster and muttered something that sounded a bit like "About time." under his breath.

"Sorry," she stated sheepishly.

Dumbledore sighed and steepled his fingers, allowing his eyes to rest only on the tips of his fingers as he got the staff's attention. After a moment, he straightened up and put his hands in his lap.

"I have called you all here today as a result of the spell detector wards Professor Snape has put on his office and living area. He reported that he checks them everyday for traces of unusual spells that could have been used while he was not present or not aware."

McGonagall leaned forward in her seat and coughed "Paranoid!" She coughed again and sat back. "So sorry, I seem to have a frog in my throat- best let Madam Pomfrey have a look at it later."

"I am _not_ paranoid! I'll have you know-" Snape began indignantly.

"That's quite all right, Minerva." Dumbledore began with a smile. He turned to Proffesor Snape. "And Severus, it is quite all right to be paranoid, because-"

"I am not paranoid!"

"In your line of work, your life used to always be in danger. It is only natural that you would put up some type of defense system in your living quarters." He turned to face them all. "Now, onto the matter at hand. When Severus' was checking yesterday's spell detections, he found traces of the Obliviation spell. That spell, as you all know, is not common knowledge, which made me wonder who could have done it."

He studied them all carefully and Hermione quickly put up her occlumency barriers like Harry and Snape had taught her during the war, only allowing Dumbledore to see what she wanted him to see.

After he had finished his wordless investigation, he smiled. "Of course, I do not think it was any of you." Hermione sighed in relief. "But I must stress on you the seriousness of this situatuon. Someone has quite possibly breached the wards and could have done any number of things before erasing the memories of the staff and leaving. I have supplemented the wards, so obliviation on the grounds is now as possible as apparation, but do keep an eye open."

The headmaster bid them a good day and Snape left quickly after a quick sneer in everyone's general direction. McGonagall just laughed and left to send out the start of the year notices.

The other proffesors walked out soon after, leaving Hermione to follow.

Once Hermione had reached her flat, she collapsed on her couch.

_I cannot believe what just happened. How could I have been so careless? I was so close to getting caught obliviating both the headmaster and the potions master! My actions have forever changed Hogwarts. Dumbledore had to actually put up anti-obliviation wards. I didn't even know there were such things. sigh Well, maybe now they will come out with a new edition of _Hogwarts, a History.

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"Okay, so no obliviation at Hogwarts. I must remember to not attempt to obliviate people at Hogwarts."

"What's that Mione?" Ron asked as a few pieces of eggs fell to the table.

Hermione eyed the eggs with distaste. "Um, nothing, and don't talk with your mouth full. I have told you a hundred times." She set her copy of _The Daily Prophet _aside and looked around the kitchen in her apartment. "I don't like the wall color. It should be faint green. What do you think?"

"Um, wall color? Really? You're asking my opinion? I like orange…"

"Right. Green it is then, and I will spare you from such further questions."

Ron nodded and made an indistinct comment while he finished his eggs. He cleaned his plate with a simple spell, which Hermione took care to remember. "Well then, thanks for breakfast. I better head to practice. Only one game left in the season." He kissed her on the cheek and put on his cloak.

"Have a good day, Ron. Tell Lavendar I said hello."

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Minutes later, Hermione was still trying to duplicate Ron's plate-cleaning spell.

_What did he do after that right-angle flick to the left? Arg! It would have been easier to just wash it. I better head to the bookstore today, so I can memorize all of the handy charms before school starts. Why didn't they ever teach these at Hogwarts? Hmm, I think I will just have to include a few of these in next year's lesson plans. _

_Note to self: Put household charms in lesson plans next year._

_**Will do.**_

_Thanks._

_**It's what I'm here for.**_

_Now time to go to Diagon Alley._

Hermione tidied up the flat and prepared to leave. Suddenly, she had a thought.

"_Paredi Verdescio!" _The walls of the kitchen changed to a faint green, and she smiled. It was much better. She walked out into the hall and performed a simple locking charm on her door. She was in the middle of changing the color of her door as well, when someone called out.

"Oh Hermione, dear. How are you this morning. What is _that_?"

Hermione followed the direction of her gaze, and she caught sight of her wand.

"_Obliviate!" _She said without hesitation. Making sure her wand was now safe in its holster, she walked down the hall, oblivious to the calls of her new neighbor, Mrs. Gonsoulin ( the one she had just obliviated!).

_It's really become second nature for me to erase someone's memory. What if someone just sneaks up on me, and I obliviate them? What if I do it in front of other people? Then I will have to obliviate them as well. This has gotten out of hand. Maybe I should just obliviate myself. Then I won't know how to obliviate._

_**No, that wouldn't work because eventually you will ask Remus to teach you how to do it, since you would have forgotten. You'll tell him you want to learn it because you moved to muggle London, and he will think you have gone mental because he has already taught you.**_

_Yeah, you're right. I need to find a way to stop the madness though. Oops, I still have to get to the bookstore before it closes._

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**A/N**

So, Hermione is really having trouble controlling herself. What a shame. I wonder what will happen at the bookstore? I wonder how many chapters this will be? Do you know? I don't. Aren't we excited?

By the way, in case you didn't know, pared is Spanish for wall, and verde is Spanish for green. I sort of just added letters to the end to make it flowy.

And, in case you didn't know, I am from Texas and am having a really hard time saying you instead ya'll. That's about it.

**Read and Review**! Please! It is so much fun to hear what you have to say, but I won't be able to if you don't write it down because you probably live far away, and I have my headphones on, so…


	3. Flourish, Blotts, and Cannons

Disclaimer: We are gathered here today, in the presence of these many witnesses, to declare that I don't own Harry Potter. That is all. Sandwhiches and cookies can be found in the room off to the right. Go check, seriously.

Author's Note: I guess this one really is about Flourish and Blotts. Fancy that.

**Chapter 3**

**Flourish, Blotts, and Cannons**

Hermione entered Flourish and Blotts with a purpose, so she strode _purposefully_ to the counter and nodded to the two men behind it.

"Mr. Flourish. Mr. Blotts. How are you this fine day?"

"Oh wonderful, darling." Mr. Blotts replied with a warm smile. "And how are you? Are you looking for anything in particular today, or do you just want to see what we have new in stock?"

"Well, Blotts, today I am in the market for household charms: cleaning the dishes, washing the floors and clothes, dusting the furniture- that sort of thing."

"Oh really now." Mr. Flourish spoke up. "Our little Miss Hermione is all grown up and looking for homemaking charms. What do you think of that, Mr. Blotts?"

"I think it is absolutely wonderful, Mr. Flourish." Mr. Blotts smile was now so warm it was bordering on creepy.

"It really isn't all that wonderful. I just thought they might come in handy." Hermione said quietly, as if afraid someone might hear.

"Nonsense, Granger." Draco Malfoy drawled, strolling up from the Dark Arts section. "You really ought to give yourself credit. Learning all those household spells might even earn you the rank of house elf. Oh, when Severus hears this- how we will _laugh_."

_Bloody hell! He always shows up at the worst times, or maybe they just become the worst times because he shows up. Anyway, he can't tell Snape. I have to work with that man- every single day!_

Hermione turned slowly around to face the terribly handsome, terribly evil man. "Malfoy. Malfoy. Malfoy. You don't really expect me to rise to your pathetic insults and threats do you? I have only one thing to say to you. _Obliviate!"_

Hermione gave her attention back to the shopowners, while Draco stumbled away, looking confused. She was about to continue her conversation with them when she noticed their stunned faces, so she obliviated them as well for good measure. Then she went off in search of some books, amazed at her lack of self control for the second -but not the last- time that day.

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Hermione apparated to the alleyway outside her flat, arms full of books. She entered the building and looked both ways in the hallway to make sure no one was coming before performing the necessary unlocking charms. She then made her way into her apartment and to a corner in the living room with bookcases and a table, where she unloaded her arms.

Opening the first book that appealed to her, she began to read as if there was no tomorrow.

_Aha! This one should clear up the ring on the table._

She strode over to the kitchen table, found the offending spot, straightened up to her full height, pointed her wand at it, and with a solemn face, said the incantation.

"_Evanify!_"

The ring disappeared instantly, but she stood still and watched the spot for a moment more, daring it come back, but it didn't, so she went back to her little table in the corner and continued to read.

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Hermione had read her books on cleaning well into the night, until she had found a spell for every type of dirt or mess in the apartment, which she then proceeded to clean up. Thus it was, that when Hermione woke up an hour later than usual (7 o' clock!- gasp), she raced around her apartment in a hurry, trying to get ready to make it to the Cannons' last game of the season.

With Ron on the team, they were no longer losing at the severe degree which they once were, but they were losing nonetheless. Hermione never missed a game, but it always made her feel bad when they lost. It never seemed to faze Ron, though. Ron, indefinitely on a high from playing with his favorite team, always acted as though they had won the World Cup, whether they beat or were beaten by a team.

She grabbed her dark blue cloak and orange Cannons' button pin. Once it was pinned to the front of her cloak, she apparated to the pitch Ron told her the match was at. She weaved her way through the small crowd and over to the players' tent. When Ron caught sight of her, he smiled and waved her over.

She obliged and gave him a quick hug and peck on the cheek. The other Cannons whistled, so she gave them all a wave as well. Ron had told her that she was a sort of good luck charm for the team, since she was the only girlfriend a player of the team had. She had thought it was a bit pathetic, but Ron defended his team, saying they were too focused on the game to have time to look for girlfriends.

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The game ended in an overwhelming defeat of the Cannons. Hermione sighed. _What a way to end the season._ She headed to the tent to give the players her usual "Don't worry, we'll get them next time!" speech, which seemed to cheer them up, even though it was never true. When she arrived, the team was huddled around Ron, who was reading a letter.

"What's that, Ron?" Hermione asked.

"It's a letter from Puddlemere. They want me to be their keeper." He replied with anger in his voice. "Wood is going to be an auror, so they thought I would just abandon the Cannons to join them."

Hermione didn't notice his tone or the murmurings of assent from the team, so she replied, "That's great, Ron! Wood says the pay is nice, and I have met the team, and-" Hermione glanced around at the faces of the Cannons, which ranged from disbelief to panic to anger (Ron).

_Gee. Always the politician, aren't we, Hermione. _

"_Septemus Obliviate!"_ Hermione hoped that was the spell that obliviated seven people at once. Looking around at the blank faces of the team, it was clear that she was successful, so she put on a big smile and said, "Good job today! And don't worry, we'll get them next season!" They all cheered up at that, so she kissed Ron goodbye and apparated home.

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_Next time I say something stupid, I am just going to have to accept the consequences. Obliviation is for use on muggles only, and it's a good thing I learned it, otherwise Mrs. Gonsoulin might have began an inquisition on exactly why I was pointing a stick at my door. Yes, even though I had to obliviate an entire quidditch team today, I do not regret learning the spell. You can never learn too much._

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**A/N **

Okay, so this chapter is a bit smaller than the others, but my back aches from leaning over my laptop, so…

I think there will only be a couple more chapters because there are only so many people Hermione can obliviate, and there are limits to her stupidity. She is acting a bit out of character in this stories, though I think she does that in any story not written by Rowling.

I am going start a bigger story after this. I just have to come up with a topic…

Evanify is a combination of Evanesco and Scourgify. I couldn't think of anything else.

Hmm. Will anyone ever find out what Hermione is doing, or will she just obliviate them all?

Thankyou to my reviewers, Emma Barrows and KaitsSlytherin!

Well, that's about all I have to say, what about you?

**Review!**


	4. AClueHarrySees

Disclaimer: My t-shirt says I don't own Harry Potter, and we all know that t-shirts don't lie.

_I dedicate this chapter to Emma Barrows, who appears to be the only one reading the story. Enjoy!_

**Chapter 4**

**AClueHarrySees**

Hermione left her flat early August 31 to get some things she would need for the upcoming school year. Ron had moved in a week ago and had immediately painted his room orange, much to Hermione's chagrin. She thought it would have looked better blue.

_Okay, so today I need to visit Diagon Alley and get some reference materials for next year's classes. Then I can visit Harry and Ginny, who should be back from Paris by now, for lunch. After that, I finish packing. I think I should be ready for the start of term after that._

_**Note to self: Don't forget the household spells.**_

_Oh right. Thanks. I need to pack the household spells. _

_**Avoid Mrs. Gonsoulin.**_

_Too right you are. It seems that all she does is sit and wait for me to leave my flat every morning! I am sure that that much obliviation is damaging to the brain. _

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Hermione knocked on the door of Harry and Ginny's flat and waited. Harry opened the door a moment later.

"Hermione. It's great to see you." He handed her a mug of tea. "That should help you warm up a bit."

Hermione gave Harry a hug and returned the sentiment. "It's great to see you as well, Harry. How was Paris?"

"Oh, it was really good. It was nice to get away for awhile...Hermione?"

"Yeah?" Hermione took a long sip from the tea Harry had given her. It was good.

"Do you want to play air-hangman?" It was a game Harry and Hermione had made up during the war. Harry used the same spell Riddle had in the Chamber of Secrets, but he instead drew a hangman game in air. They hadn't played it for years.

"Um, sure Harry. Why now?"

"No reason. Okay, I get to be the person who comes up with the word." He drew the platform the person to be drawn on, and he added a boiling cauldron underneath. Then he slashed eleven blanks next to it. "Category: spells."

"Wow, vivid, Harry. Um, how about a T."

"Good job. One T." (- - - - - - - t - - - )

"Hmm. Nothing comes to mind right away. I guess I will just go with all the vowels. A, E, I, O, and U."

"You usually aren't supposed to guess more than one letter at a time, but I will give it to you. U and E are wrong, so there is a circle for the head, and some bushy hair." He winked. She gave him a look. "Let me fill in the correct vowels now." (o- - i – i a t i o -)

"Wow." Hermione was starting to recognize this word. She wasn't the smartest witch in her class for nothing, but she didn't believe that _that_ was the word Harry had chosen.

_I mean, why would he? What a random thing to come up with, right? All I have to do is choose letters different from the spell that I am thinking of, and then I will see that I am just being paranoid. Okay, here it goes._

"How about a C?"

Harry's response was to draw fearful eyes on the bushy-haired head.

"Um, D?"

He added a mouth in an O shape.

"F. I bet there is an f."

Suddenly there was a nose on the floating head.

"G."

Harry had a look of deep concentration on his face as he drew a long stick for the body.

"H or J or K?"

He put two sticks on either side of the long one for arms and added one hand.

"Wow." She laughed nervously. " I am not as good at this as I used to be. Um, M?"

"Did you say N?" He went to add a letter to the blanks.

"No, no." She replied hurriedly. "M."

"Oh." He drew another hand.

"Please let one be P, Q, or R."

He drew two legs and a foot.

"S?"

Another foot.

"V?"

The rope was drawn.

"Oh, I guess I died. It's my turn right? I'll just erase this game-"

He put a hand on her wand. "No, Hermione. This is extreme hang-man. She won't die until she falls in the cauldron. You can save her if you guess right in the next five turns." He said all of this with a very serious expression.

"Right." She sat back down. "W."

Hermione sighed as he let the string break a little bit.

"X?"

It broke a little more. The girl in the game struggled with the rope and glared at Hermione.

Hermione turned away. "Y?"

It broke even more. It wouldn't hold her for much longer.

"Z." There it was. The last letter she would let herself use.

The rope shredded a bit more until it was only being held by a small fraction of what it use to be. The girl in the game was getting very frustrated.

"Hermione? You have one guess left. If you guess the word right, you can save her. Come on, Hermione, don't let her fall into the cauldron. She won't appreciate it very much."

Hermione faced the girl again, sighed, and gave up. "Obliviation." she mumbled.

"I'm sorry. I didn't catch that." Harry had a patient smile lighting up his face.

"Obliviation!" The letters filled in, the rope and cauldron disappeared, and a floating platform saved the girl. She bowed and it all disappeared.

Harry sat down across from Hermione. "So."

"So what, Harry?" she said, exasperated. "What was this all about?" Hermione was pretty sure she knew, but she didn't want to believe it. _How could he have figured out what I was doing? _"Was there a certain reason you chose obliviation for your word? Why did we even play that game?"

"Oh, the game? I just thought it would be fun." He paused and looked at Hermione for a moment. "Anyway, you know how I taught you and Ron occlumency during the war? Well, part of occlumency, as you may remember, is organizing your thoughts, so you can allow people to see only what you want them to see."

"Yes, Harry, I remember."

"Good. Well, I have continued to use those techniques because I find it keeps my mind sharp, which always helps in auror training, and one never knows when occlumency could come in handy."

"I see your point, Harry, but where are you going with this?"

"Just give me a minute. Now, there are many reasons that people might forget things: maybe because it just wasn't important enough for to remember, perhaps a busy schedule made it easy to forget, or a spell...obliviation, for example... caused them to forget. However, no matter the reason, occlumency doesn't allow me to forget."

"Harry." She was starting to get just a _bit_ nervous.

"Let me finish. That day we talked over coffee, you asked me about Kreacher." Hermione looked about ready to run away. She stood up and began pacing around instead. "I got upset, and you made me forget what we had talked about, but later, when I was organizing my thoughts, it was still there, and I remember. Hermione, why did you do it?"

"I don't know! Remus taught me, and you were really angry, and I didn't want to get in a fight." With that, she burst into guilty tears.

Harry laughed and enveloped her in a hug. "It's okay, Hermione. We all make mistakes. I'm not mad, but I would appreciate it if you abstained from erasing my memories- or anyone else's- in the future."

Hermione returned the hug and gave a weak laugh. "I guess that's a reasonable thing to ask, Harry. I will try my best, but what should I do? I have obliviated a lot of people recently. I performed that spell on the entire Cannons quidditch team the other day!"

Harry's eyes lit up with amusement. "You did? That is priceless! I wish I could have seen their faces."

"Did you know that Dumbledore had to put up anti-obliviation wards at Hogwarts because of me? Of course, he didn't know it was me, but still."

"It really is a shame." Harry spoke with a serious face. "Look at all the trouble one ex-head girl can cause." He tisked and shook his head before giggling hysterically.

"Wow, Harry. It really wasn't all that funny. I think I should leave before you are diagnosed as clinically insane." Harry sobered up a bit at that. "Um, Harry…," she said as she gathered up her things. "You won't tell anyone about this will you? Please?"

"No, Hermione, I won't. You know I can't deny that face." His voice turned to a whisper as Ginny came through the door. "One more thing, Hermione."

What he told her made her eyes widen in realization, and he smirked before pushing her shocked form the rest of the way out the door.

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As Hermione packed her things that night, her mind kept running over what Harry had told her. She wondered what she would do when she got back to school. She was a little scared, to tell you the truth.

She would not be afraid enough to quit or anything, but she knew it was only a matter of time before _he_ caught up with her, and obliviation wasn't even possible at Hogwarts anymore.

"_Remember, Snape is an occlumens too..."_

Harry had thought the whole thing was rather funny, but she hoped he still thought it was funny when he was giving the eulogy at her funeral once Snape realized that it was she who tripped the wards.

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**A/N**

What do you think? Is everyone excited about the showdown with Snape? I, for one, cannot wait to see how Hermione handles it.

Only one more chapter!

**Review! **


	5. No More Mr Nice Snape

Disclaimer: Okay, so send fan mail about Harry Potter in general to Rowling, but if you like this story, send it to me.

**Chapter 5**

**No More Mr. Nice Snape**

Hermione apparated to the entrance gates of Hogwarts early Friday, September 1. She hurried to her quarters and performed a few charms she had learned in the DA before entering to make sure no one had tampered with her room.

_I am as paranoid as Snape!_

She unpacked and prepared for classes Monday morning. She wanted to go take a walk outside, so she pulled out the Marauder's Map (Harry had let her borrow it when she took the job at Hogwarts, on the condition that she give it to the first child he had come to Hogwarts) and looked for Snape. He appeared to be pacing in his study.

Hermione could not wait for Ron to visit on Saturday. She would feel safer with him there, but she had feeling she needed to get the confrontation with Snape out of the way, or she would have to hold classes in the safety of her living quarters.

Thus it was that she went on her walk alone, without the map, and without a disillusionment spell. If Snape wanted to speak to her, he would just have to find her.

_What am I worried about? Maybe he doesn't even do occlumency anymore, you know, what with Voldemort gone and all._

_**Does that sound like Severus Snape?**_

_Poo._

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Dumbledore called a staff meeting later that afternoon to discuss the new year and welcome everyone back. Once it had ended, Hermione tried to get out of the door and leave Snape behind, but somehow, everyone reached the exit before her.

Snape shut the door behind them, so it was just the two of them in the staff room. Hermione wasn't scared.

_And why should I be? He is just an ex- death eater who was in Voldemort's inner circle. He only tricked one of the greatest dark wizards for over fifteen years. That's nothing. Sure, he probably knows how to use the killing curse pretty well, but its just two words. Avada Kedavra. See? I know it too. He isn't scary._

"Miss Granger-" He began in a dangerously soft voice.

"Um, that's Professor Granger." She gave him a smile despite her nerves. Even if she was scared, she wasn't going to let him know it.

"Oh, of course. Professor Granger," he continued in the same tone, "Do you know what is the worst insult in the wizarding world, aside from breaking someone's wand?"

"No, no I am not familiar with that." she spoke as she edged towards the door.

He stepped directly in front of the only exit. "It is tampering with their memory."

She stopped, "Oh really. How interesting. I didn't know that. You learn something new every day, don't you?" She gave a fake yawn. "Well, I think I need to get nap before the start of term feast. If you'll excuse-"

"No, Professor Granger. If I could have just one more minute of your time, it would be greatly appreciated." a dark smile, which he might have thought was polite, graced his face.

"I don't think you were asking for permission, so just hurry on with it." her fear was replaced by annoyance that he was jumping around the subject. Plus, he couldn't hurt her when Dumbledore was in the building. She had to remain logical at all costs.

"Very well, very well." He seemed to be making an effort to talk even slower now. "I know as a fact that you attempted to erase my memories, but don't ask me how I know. I am simply a very powerful wizard, and I don't think you would understand if-"

"It was occlumency. Harry already told me, so don't try to gloat."

He seemed taken aback for a moment but quickly recovered. "The fact remains that you insulted me greatly that day, and the only way to get my honor back is to challenge you to duel and win. So, wands at the ready."

She simply stared at him in shock. _He wants me to duel him- in the staff room? Is he crazy?_

"So sorry, did your precious _Potter_ not tell you that? Well, it doesn't matter; you have to accept."

"Whatever." She vanished everything from the room and enlarged the space it wordlessly. Snape raised his eyebrows; it was advanced magic. "What? You didn't think we battled Death Eaters with expelliarmus, did you? One, two, three."

She quickly disillusioned herself and performed a simple but effective blocking charm. It didn't block physical attacks though, so when Snape conjured some powdery substance and showered the room with it, her location was made. She cancelled the spell and went on the offensive with a charm that made the opponet's spells come out mis worded.

"UMBDA PELLSSA!" she yelled. It worked. Nothing Snape said made any sense. He began to use wordless spells, which was even worse because Hermione didn't know how to defend herself from them. He still kept shouting random things throughout the duel, though, which made him seem rather funny. She laughed, and this enraged him further.

Hermione was levitated into the air, but she sent a ball of fire at him, and he lost his concentration. She fell to the ground, hard. She bound him with ropes and turned his hair pink. He quickly cut through the ropes and conjured a panther to chase her around. She conjured a cage for it and sent it to the edge of the room. It was mewing loudly, so she conjured some water for it as well. Snape looked at her strangely, but she just shrugged.

They both shook off other thoughts and took defensive poses. They sent spells off at the same time, and she flew across the room and hit the wall, while Snape was encased in a large, clear ball. It was a bit like a hamster's ball, but it could only be vanished by the person who created it.

Hermione rolled over. She hurt, a lot, but she sat up to finish her spell. She let the panther out of the cage and sent it over to Snape. The cat growled and started chasing the ball around the room, while Hermione cackled madly.

It was in this position that the Headmaster found them in only a moment later. Hermione, covered in green powder, was slumped against the wall, and laughing in between her pants for breath. Snape, with pink hair, was rolling around in a large ball and being chased by a panther. He kept yelling something, but Dumbledore couldn't understand him.

"ENOUGH!" he roared. He vanished everything and returned the staff room to normal. Hermione banished the ball as well, and she and Snape got up immediately and stood before the headmaster silently. "Now, can someone tell me what going on here?"

They both spoke at the same time.

Snape mumbled something about, "potion ingredients…memory…spell wards…insult."

Hermione said, "polyjuice…challenged a duel…think I won."

"Cheater." he hissed.

"As if! Loser!"

"Ahem." Dumbledore broke in. "I think it would be prudent to let this matter rest. From the looks of it, Miss Granger was winning, and once a duel for honor has been won, the subject must be dropped." Hermione smiled trimphantly, but Dumbledore wasn't finished yet. "Miss Granger, I believe that we now know who tripped the wards in Mr. Snape's quarters?" She nodded solemnly. "Well, please refrain from obliviating my staff any further, and I will also let this go."

"Yes Professor Dumbledore. I am so sorry!"

Snape scoffed in disbelief, but Dumbledore smiled. "I have no doubt that you are. Now, to your rooms, the both of you."

They both left to go to their separate quarters, Hermione promising that she would never obliviate another wizard, and Snape vowing never to challenge Hermione to duel again.

Dumbledore watched them go and laughed. He slowly shut the door to the staff room and popped a lemon drop in his mouth. Then he pulled a photograph out of his robe that he had taken wandlessly when he first came. He laughed some more and then hurried off to show Minerva.

_Finis_

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A/N

I did not like this chapter as much as the others, but people were wanting me to post soon, and my sister seems to think it is pretty cool, so there you have it.

Okay, so that's the end. It was just a short, hopefully funny, fic. Tell me if you liked it.

I want to thank Emma Barrows for her reviews, and I want to thank the people who have read my fic but have never reviewed. I invite you to do so now.


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